X-mess Cooler

A nice way to cool down from holiday stress

I don't know about you but I find the holiday season stressful. Trying to find gifts that no one will hate. Navigating people who don't know how to drive in parking lots. Sweating in winter jackets while waiting in long lines in every type of store imaginable. When I get home from that, the last thing I want is some kind of warm rum drink. I want something nice and cool and refreshing. Mojtos and Palomas are out of season, but that's the idea. So, I've been working on a way to infuse the X-mess spirit into a long drink with lots of ice to cool down my temper and overheated overdressed body.

I started by infusing some gin with rosemary, which enhances the piney-ness of the juniper in gin. I knew that with the right balance of tart and sweet it would bring out the pine without tasting like a pine cone. I used 4 or 5 fresh rosemary stalks to about a quart of gin and left it in the fridges for several days before straining out the rosemary. I suspect that it would be fine after just a day or two.

I considered using a softer acid like fresh squeezed orange but wanted to avoid citrus and play around with unsweetened cranberry for its holiday reference and tart flavor. I tried it with a variety of sweet mixers, including orange liqueurs, amaretto, and even Becherovka (a spiced full proof Czech liqueur that has a strong flavor of cloves), but just couldn't get the balance right. The closest I got was the nutty almond flavor of the amaretto, which had a nice marzipan reference and reminded me of traditional X-mess cookies and candy but ultimately it overpowered the pine.

I looked through my abundant shelf of spirits and my eyes fell upon a rarely used but delicious and unique liqueur called Créme de Noyaux. Although it is made with pits of various stone fruits, it has a delicate almond taste profile with a hint of fruitiness. And, after some basic research I discovered that back in the 19th century after aging it can produce small quantities of cyanide which would float to the top and poison the first glass! Perfect for the holiday spirit, although sadly this effect has been curtailed in modern distilling. Regardless, this was the answer. The pine/fir tree aroma and flavor of the gin was tamed but not lost, the cranberry with sweet almond balanced perfectly and a hint of mint bitters added a hint of candy cane on the nose. This is a wonderfully balanced melange of all the flavors and scents of X-mess without the mess and a great way to cool off either before, during or after your holiday escapades.

X-mess Cooler

• 1½ oz rosemary infused gin

• ¾ oz Créme de Noyaux

• ½ oz unsweetened cranberry juice

• 2 dashes mint bitters

• top with seltzer

Shake all but seltzer, strain into collins glass filled with crushed ice and top with seltzer and add a candy cane decorated paper straw